Friday, March 16, 2012
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
Nigga
If I’m not mistaken, the term “nigga” is a widely used word by the Black community…
Allow me to repeat myself. The term “nigga” is a widely used word by the BLACK community.
Whether it’s a term of endearment or derogatory, it is not meant for any other race to adopt as their own. If you are not Black, I’m here to tell you, you do not get a pass to use this word. It’s not funny, it’s not cute. It’s rude and disrespectful.
It is not your job to help us reclaim the word. Remove it from your vocabulary.
Sincerely,
Black Person
P.S. If I catch you using it, jokingly or not, I’m fucking you up on sight.
Allow me to repeat myself. The term “nigga” is a widely used word by the BLACK community.
Whether it’s a term of endearment or derogatory, it is not meant for any other race to adopt as their own. If you are not Black, I’m here to tell you, you do not get a pass to use this word. It’s not funny, it’s not cute. It’s rude and disrespectful.
It is not your job to help us reclaim the word. Remove it from your vocabulary.
Sincerely,
Black Person
P.S. If I catch you using it, jokingly or not, I’m fucking you up on sight.
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Friday, March 9, 2012
The Summary
I wish I could be a better me, for you.
... But this is me, I am who I am. And what will be, will be.
... But this is me, I am who I am. And what will be, will be.
This Is What You Wanted Right?
I wouldn't say my intelligence gets in the way of happiness, because I'm happy. Sometimes I wish I were less educated, naive, oblivious. Maybe then I'd fall for the okie doke and be exactly who most people want me to be. But I'm not naive. I'm not oblivious. I'm educated and I see through people like a piece of transparent tape. I certainly don't let it be known right away. But I know the end result of nearly every situation when I deal with people because I know me. I know how I am. And being able to see how things will pan out creates in me the "I don't care."
So, here are a few things I'd like to write about that, don't necessarily confuse me, but fuels the apathetic fire in me.
1. I'm no longer trying to figure this out, but for every guy that likes me, I'll be sure to make this absolutely clear: I don't tolerate childish behavior. What constitutes childish?
"Why won't you spend time with me?"
"Why don't you answer when I call?"
"Why don't you call me?"
"Why do you ignore some of my texts?"
"I've seen you on the phone before, but you don't answer when I call."
"Be a woman about yours" (I absolutely LOATHE this one.)
"You don't know who you are or what you want"
Explain? Gladly. Every guy that likes me and held at least ONE conversation with me knows what I don't like. How do they know this? Because I TELL THEM. I don't like questions. If I don't ask you, don't ask me. If you were meant to know, I'd willingly tell you. Other than that, chill on the 20 questions. Secondly, I have much more important things to do than sit around and make googly eyes at you all day, talk about absolutely NOTHING over the phone, and further my risk of carpel-tunnel by texting you 24/7. If my characteristics bother you that much, by all means, WALK.
Ah, the infamous "be a woman about yours." Television has done a number on my peers that's for sure. And common sense is no longer common. Has it ever occurred to you, that NOT revealing everything I'm thinking at the moment just may be the womanly route? It never ceases to amaze me how people could beg for someone to just be honest with them, and when they are in fact honest, the person's feelings are hurt. They're angry. Hmm... I'm going to suggest you look within yourself and see if that's what you really want. How about you be honest with yourself? Think of the worst case scenario. If you told your woman to be honest with you, that you could take it, and she tells you she's been cheating on you and she doesn't plan to stop. Could you take that?
I think when a person says that you don't know who you are or what you want without concrete proof, they've played their last card and they're reiterating what you've already said to them. Thus proving that they themselves, don't know who they are. Believe me when I tell you, I know exactly who I am and I know exactly what I want. Because if I didn't, I'd probably be behaving like YOU. Yes I can give you a hundred examples of your uncertainty of yourself sir. Believe me when I tell you, from the moment I first MET you, I read you like a 15 page book. So, when you tell me I don't know who I am, I laugh. There's no point in wasting time trying to explain everything to you. It would be like talking to a brick wall. Your mind is closed. As a matter of fact I don't even think you have a mind of your own TO close. You don't have it, and unless you receive the constructive criticism, you never will.
There's a rule to dating, or even showing interest in another person: You never EVER show your cards. Constantly telling them you like them, or hell, even LOVE them is not going to make them love you back. (Lie to yourself and say that the person doesn't have to. Go ahead. LIE.) Telling them you cry over them will not send them running into your arms. It'll probably send them running in the opposite direction thinking you're insane. ESPECIALLY if you've never been intimate.
Tell me...
Have you ever tasted the other person's lips?
Had a long mutually embracing hug?
Had sex?
Held hands?
No?
Hmm... I'd really like to know what signs were given that this was anything more than a friendship? Do tell.
Another rule of successful dating is both parties know how to pace themselves. They don't rush. One gives the other time to miss them. They don't have to talk EVERY DAY. They don't have to see each other EVERY DAY. Remember I said that? "I hadn't talked to you in a few days, it gave me time to miss you." I suppose those last 2 words "miss you" threw you into overdrive full speed ahead. And now look at you. What have you got? Nothing.
Think about your previous relationship. Why did that fail? I believe I heard something along the lines of "I called her 30 times in a row because she didn't answer." I believe you're repeating old habits my boy. Sending the same repetitive text messages every day (coffee? breakfast? lunch? dinner? In that order) can drive a person nuts.
Now, I know I'm not perfect and I've got some issues to work out on my own. But to try to play me like a fool? That's a bad idea. A very bad idea. I'm not an idiot. And I'm very aware of my issues and their causes. Nobody can tell me about myself, especially when they're terribly inaccurate.
Why didn't I want to spend time with you when you wanted? Why did I prefer not to hang out with you? These are questions you ask, but should already have the answer. I LIKE TO BE ALONE. I LIKE BEING BY MYSELF. I DON'T WANT TO BE IN THE COMPANY OF PEOPLE UNLESS I HAVE TO. I DON'T LIKE NOISE, I LIKE SILENCE. I DON'T LIKE REPETITIVE IGNORANT BANTER WHERE YOU'RE AGREEING WITH EVERY FUCKING THING I SAY.
Let me say this again... I LIKE TO BE ALONE. No, I LOVE to be alone. I dare you to judge me on my preferences. Be that person that judges another for not being who they want them to be. BE THAT PERSON.
Or you'd rather not? Good. You don't tell a person you love them, but then condemn them for being who they are. I know who I am. And I love this person because it took me years to find her. You have a problem with how she operates? Fuck you. That's it.
I know the kind of man I want. Both physically, intellectually, and emotionally. I know EXACTLY what I want.
I know the kind of life I want.
I know the kind of career I want.
And I'm not afraid to go after ANY of them. Anything I say I want to do, I go and do it. It NEVER remains a dream. Take notes.
Anyway, I believe I've got the core of it jotted down. Laid it all out there on the table. Read it. Then reread it. Then reread it again until it sinks in and you UNDERSTAND it.
This is my solemn vow on Friday March 9, 2012 I will never waste my breath or opposable thumb capabilities trying to explain to someone what they should already know. I will not fuss or argue. Especially if I don't feel the person is remotely worth it.
... That's what you wanted right? To understand why I wouldn't spend as much time with you as you requested? Why I didn't want to have coffee, breakfast, lunch, and/or dinner with you? Here it is. You're welcome.
So, here are a few things I'd like to write about that, don't necessarily confuse me, but fuels the apathetic fire in me.
1. I'm no longer trying to figure this out, but for every guy that likes me, I'll be sure to make this absolutely clear: I don't tolerate childish behavior. What constitutes childish?
"Why won't you spend time with me?"
"Why don't you answer when I call?"
"Why don't you call me?"
"Why do you ignore some of my texts?"
"I've seen you on the phone before, but you don't answer when I call."
"Be a woman about yours" (I absolutely LOATHE this one.)
"You don't know who you are or what you want"
Explain? Gladly. Every guy that likes me and held at least ONE conversation with me knows what I don't like. How do they know this? Because I TELL THEM. I don't like questions. If I don't ask you, don't ask me. If you were meant to know, I'd willingly tell you. Other than that, chill on the 20 questions. Secondly, I have much more important things to do than sit around and make googly eyes at you all day, talk about absolutely NOTHING over the phone, and further my risk of carpel-tunnel by texting you 24/7. If my characteristics bother you that much, by all means, WALK.
Ah, the infamous "be a woman about yours." Television has done a number on my peers that's for sure. And common sense is no longer common. Has it ever occurred to you, that NOT revealing everything I'm thinking at the moment just may be the womanly route? It never ceases to amaze me how people could beg for someone to just be honest with them, and when they are in fact honest, the person's feelings are hurt. They're angry. Hmm... I'm going to suggest you look within yourself and see if that's what you really want. How about you be honest with yourself? Think of the worst case scenario. If you told your woman to be honest with you, that you could take it, and she tells you she's been cheating on you and she doesn't plan to stop. Could you take that?
I think when a person says that you don't know who you are or what you want without concrete proof, they've played their last card and they're reiterating what you've already said to them. Thus proving that they themselves, don't know who they are. Believe me when I tell you, I know exactly who I am and I know exactly what I want. Because if I didn't, I'd probably be behaving like YOU. Yes I can give you a hundred examples of your uncertainty of yourself sir. Believe me when I tell you, from the moment I first MET you, I read you like a 15 page book. So, when you tell me I don't know who I am, I laugh. There's no point in wasting time trying to explain everything to you. It would be like talking to a brick wall. Your mind is closed. As a matter of fact I don't even think you have a mind of your own TO close. You don't have it, and unless you receive the constructive criticism, you never will.
There's a rule to dating, or even showing interest in another person: You never EVER show your cards. Constantly telling them you like them, or hell, even LOVE them is not going to make them love you back. (Lie to yourself and say that the person doesn't have to. Go ahead. LIE.) Telling them you cry over them will not send them running into your arms. It'll probably send them running in the opposite direction thinking you're insane. ESPECIALLY if you've never been intimate.
Tell me...
Have you ever tasted the other person's lips?
Had a long mutually embracing hug?
Had sex?
Held hands?
No?
Hmm... I'd really like to know what signs were given that this was anything more than a friendship? Do tell.
Another rule of successful dating is both parties know how to pace themselves. They don't rush. One gives the other time to miss them. They don't have to talk EVERY DAY. They don't have to see each other EVERY DAY. Remember I said that? "I hadn't talked to you in a few days, it gave me time to miss you." I suppose those last 2 words "miss you" threw you into overdrive full speed ahead. And now look at you. What have you got? Nothing.
Think about your previous relationship. Why did that fail? I believe I heard something along the lines of "I called her 30 times in a row because she didn't answer." I believe you're repeating old habits my boy. Sending the same repetitive text messages every day (coffee? breakfast? lunch? dinner? In that order) can drive a person nuts.
Now, I know I'm not perfect and I've got some issues to work out on my own. But to try to play me like a fool? That's a bad idea. A very bad idea. I'm not an idiot. And I'm very aware of my issues and their causes. Nobody can tell me about myself, especially when they're terribly inaccurate.
Why didn't I want to spend time with you when you wanted? Why did I prefer not to hang out with you? These are questions you ask, but should already have the answer. I LIKE TO BE ALONE. I LIKE BEING BY MYSELF. I DON'T WANT TO BE IN THE COMPANY OF PEOPLE UNLESS I HAVE TO. I DON'T LIKE NOISE, I LIKE SILENCE. I DON'T LIKE REPETITIVE IGNORANT BANTER WHERE YOU'RE AGREEING WITH EVERY FUCKING THING I SAY.
Let me say this again... I LIKE TO BE ALONE. No, I LOVE to be alone. I dare you to judge me on my preferences. Be that person that judges another for not being who they want them to be. BE THAT PERSON.
Or you'd rather not? Good. You don't tell a person you love them, but then condemn them for being who they are. I know who I am. And I love this person because it took me years to find her. You have a problem with how she operates? Fuck you. That's it.
I know the kind of man I want. Both physically, intellectually, and emotionally. I know EXACTLY what I want.
I know the kind of life I want.
I know the kind of career I want.
And I'm not afraid to go after ANY of them. Anything I say I want to do, I go and do it. It NEVER remains a dream. Take notes.
Anyway, I believe I've got the core of it jotted down. Laid it all out there on the table. Read it. Then reread it. Then reread it again until it sinks in and you UNDERSTAND it.
This is my solemn vow on Friday March 9, 2012 I will never waste my breath or opposable thumb capabilities trying to explain to someone what they should already know. I will not fuss or argue. Especially if I don't feel the person is remotely worth it.
... That's what you wanted right? To understand why I wouldn't spend as much time with you as you requested? Why I didn't want to have coffee, breakfast, lunch, and/or dinner with you? Here it is. You're welcome.
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Just Go
I don't want to constantly think, "how do I continue to make this work?" For the most part, it wouldn't be "I" it would be "we." But, I don't want that question running through my mind.
I don't want to fight. I don't want to argue. I don't want to fiend for continuous reassurance. I don't want to feel jealousy. I don't want to be tied down.
I want to take trips, long walks in foreign places, laugh, talk, debate, sit by a body of water and breathe. I want to be with that someone. Lay their head in my lap or mine in theirs. Hold hands. Make appreciative and adoring love. I want to just go. Just be.
Hmm. I say these things. But in actuality, I don't know what the fuck I want.
I don't want to fight. I don't want to argue. I don't want to fiend for continuous reassurance. I don't want to feel jealousy. I don't want to be tied down.
I want to take trips, long walks in foreign places, laugh, talk, debate, sit by a body of water and breathe. I want to be with that someone. Lay their head in my lap or mine in theirs. Hold hands. Make appreciative and adoring love. I want to just go. Just be.
Hmm. I say these things. But in actuality, I don't know what the fuck I want.
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